I know everyone says it, but this first couple of weeks of
college have truly felt like a few months. I feel like September has simultaneously
gone extremely slow (it seems like a life ago since I went to see Hamlet on the
5th – oh yes, that’s something that happened! I’ll come back to it)
and then it also feels like I’ve missed it all... It’s October next week and
that’s a bit crazy isn’t it? Less than three months until Christmas! (But
Halloween first of course).
I have no idea how long it’s been since I posted on here.
Probably not very long, really, but as I mentioned, time seems extremely slow
at the moment so it feels like it’s been about 15 years. Anyway, I just figured, whilst I still have
some time and a functioning laptop (I typed that bit a bit sceptically, hoping
my laptop wouldn’t suddenly shut down from the sheer levels of irony) I should
probably write something on here. As I have previously said, this is a bit of a
stress reliever, so there’s another reason to talk to you today.
I’m getting really stressed lately. I’m getting stressed
over things that shouldn’t stress me out and I have no idea why! I think it
partly may be because I’ve just gone back to college. Now, to be fair, my
teachers haven’t exactly piled loads of homework on me but the first week or so
of college usually means the “Hello nice to meet you - here’s what you’ll have
to struggle through this year!” period. The total word count of all the
coursework I have to do is slowly mounting up... Now I know everyone else has
the same and it’s not due for ages but to me right now it feels as if I’m going
to have to have it all ready for next week or something... It’s like if I have a list of more than 5
things to do in a day I start getting stressed about it. I need to stop this!
It doesn’t help either that what I want to do in my future seems
to have conflicting opinions all over the place whenever I ask for advice! I’m
very unsure about what I’m actually going to do and the amount teachers keep
asking me about it makes me just not want to talk about it at all! I won’t go
into the boring details but basically they’re telling me negative things I
already know and it’s sounding a bit like a stuck record. Even though I don’t
know what I’m actually going to do, I know what I’m doing (does that make
sense? It’s pretty late).
Anyway! September then – what’s been happening? Well, at the
start of September I went to the Barbican to see Hamlet with Benedict
Cumberbatch (that makes it sound like I was sat with him... He was playing
Hamlet just to be clear). I go to the theatre as much as I can and it was such
an amazing performance. I somehow managed to get row B tickets but the way the
seats curved around it meant I was about a metre away from the stage and at one
point Benedict was lying down for about 5 minutes in a scene about two and a
half metres away from me. It’s so surreal to see an actor you’ve only seen on
television and film act right in front of you. I could go on about it for ages
but I won’t seeing as I realise I’ve just used about 150 words alone just
saying all that! Plus I don’t want to spoil anything. If you want to see it in
the cinema though you totally should!
Most of the rest of September has been lost to the depths of
education and I’m a bit disorientated but overall it’s been a good month
really. I honestly do need to get organised though because I have to start applying
to universities next month and it’s stressing me out trying to pick things whilst
questioning everything 24/7! Plus there’s the fact that I haven’t finished my
personal statement yet and it’s pretty rubbish at the moment to be honest. So
yes, better get onto that soon.
Anyway, it’s just gone midnight and I should probably attempt
to keep up some sort of non-nocturnal sleep cycle!
Laura.
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