Back to reality.

I’m not going to lie to you, I nearly started writing this blog post in the same word document as my personal statement... That would have been interesting if I’d accidentally posted that thing online... Anyway, I’m sure you’re all wondering why I’m posting again so soon and to be frank I’m wondering the same thing. I suppose it’s just because it’s a dull (both in weather and activities) bank holiday Monday and I just feel like doing something sort of productive. That’s the thing though – I’m not sure this blog could technically be counted as productive. I’m also writing it now because I’m taking the opportunity of my laptop actually working at a normal functioning speed. Yes, you actually read that right – the old beast is actually working. I think it heard distant whispers of “maybe I need to replace it” and finally decided to get its shit together. I’m sure it will be back to its old crashing self soon enough but for now I’m just going to enjoy the absence of (not responding).

I do actually have things I need to be doing, though. First are some pretty thick handbooks I need to read for the volunteering I just started. It’s in my local museum and although I love history, I’m a modernist at heart and I know nothing about the Tudors really so this is going to take a bit of learning to get me up to the standard of being able to actually point at something and go “this is this thing and it did this in this year”. It should be pretty good though – although I’m a bit rubbish at the whole working in the cafe lark. Apparently I don’t know how to serve tea to a lady (yes, it’s that proper) so I’m going to have to learn quickly.

I also need to learn my maths. Still. I did mention in the last blog post that I was leaving to go and do some maths revision and let’s just say that didn’t exactly happen. So I’m still in the same situation. I’m going to have to force myself to do some in a bit though because I will be well and truly screwed when I get back to college if I don’t.

Is it weird I’m sort of looking forward to having a timetable and set routine again? I love lazing about doing nothing as much as the next person, but it’s literally gotten to the point where I do not know what to watch on Netflix. I have watched all 61 episodes of Skins and all the Louis Theroux documentaries on there and I have hit a dead end with television shows. Yet another reason I look forward to September – new television series! But yes, I think going back to college will give me a bit of a motivation to actually do something more productive. Plus, I’m rubbish at working at home. Knowing my college though I probably won’t get my finalised timetable until the eleventh hour – I’m not joking, I missed twenty minutes of my first English lesson last year because they changed the room like an hour before the lesson. I just want to know what I’m dealing with already, and also who I’m dealing with – I swear if they don’t put me with my friends again this year I will be mildly narked.

On a lighter note, I got accepted into a Channel 4 workshop day in September! They said I have a chance to network so hopefully I can find more out about the television industry and all that jazz. It should be really good – even if I do have to wake up at about 5am to catch my train. They even have chances to win further experience opportunities, so fingers crossed! I'll probably talk about it at some point...

Anyway, I  really need to do some maths now. For real, this time.

Laura. 

Summertime Madness

Summer break is always a bit daunting really. I know this sounds a crazy thing to say but let me carry on... Basically, I feel like I'm a bit useless during summer. I think a lifetime of television has conditioned me to feel like I should be doing something every day during summer. Whether that be something productive or fun, I should be doing something cool and not just lazing around on Netflix most of the time. I've literally spent most of this summer watching Skins and Louis Theroux documentaries (I recommend them strongly!)

Let's be real though, I'm never going to be as productive as Phineas and Ferb in their summer vacation (sidenote - how did they afford to do all those things?) but I still can't help but feel a bit useless. The thing is I do actually have a list (written out on actual paper, how official!) of all the things I need to do this summer. I'll just say it's not quite completed... I've attempted and sort of muddled together a draft for my personal statement so hopefully the teachers won't be too disappointed when they have to read it. It's so hard trying to sell yourself when you don't really do a lot! I end up writing about how I dropped my pen in year 8 and it gave me the skills of resilience to carry on... (I am kidding, don't worry). I know it may sound a bit silly but I really do feel a bit silly when writing bits of it. I'm sure I have gained the skills from certain things but it is pretty hard to put into formal coherent words (you know how bad I am at formal writing - look at this blog).

It doesn't really help either that my laptop has some sort of vendetta against me and refuses to even load. I'm not even joking, it's ridiculous. The amount of times I see (not responding) a day is mindnumbing. I am actually typing this out on my iPad right now as the blank word document I opened 10 minutes ago is still not opening! Wonderful. I'll have to stick it out a bit longer until university though, so I'm counting on you laptop, even if you are sort of held together in places by tape...

It doesn't actually feel like summer though - not to me. I may be the only one who feels this way but I think that whole endless feeling of summer holidays has ended for me now. Am I growing up or is it just the fact the weather is horrible (typical, Britain, nice one) and I have lots of work to do? Who knows.

On a more positive note, though, my summer has been pretty good really! I went to the National Theatre with some friends at the start of August to see Three Days In The Country. It was such an amazing play and I am still shocked that I managed to get a second row ticket for £5 (thank you theatre for student tickets!). I also met Mark Gatiss afterwards and if you know me you'll know I'm a big fan of his work and I was so thrilled to meet him properly! I am also going to see Hamlet at the start of September (second row again - what is it with my tickets?) and I am incredibly excited to see that. I've also been on some great days out, one of which being the Warner Brothers studio tour - trust me if you like Harry Potter you need to visit! I also went to the space museum which again if you know me, you'll know I do love space a lot. So much in fact that me and my friend went down to Bristol and we went a bit mad about the prospect of going in a planetarium (I was also introduced to Shakeaway milkshakes that day and it was beautiful). 

Another thing that's happened this month is my exam results came out! Now strangely I didn't really feel much of a tense buildup to the day as I did with my GCSE results, even though these are essentially more important. I suppose it was just the exams went so quickly and felt a bit like mock exams (and our mocks didn't feel like mocks either...). Also the fact that I had no massive break at the end of them - no, we had to go straight into work for second year... Which I am continuing to do now. I got the grades I wanted though so I guess all of the work paid off! Plus, I can drop psychology finally. I know maths is probably going to kill me but I don't think I can take any more research methods, honestly. 

The pressure is well and truly on now, though. I have the predicted grades I need to apply to the universities I want but the next challenge lies in actually achieving those grades. I'm not going to have any sort of social life next year at this rate (although let's be realistic I didn't really have one anyway). One of my biggest problems now though is that I have completely forgotten how to do any of my maths, which is slightly awkward as I have a test on it all when I get back... That should be fun.

It's been a nice change to actually speak about things I am doing positively for a change! I am sorting some other stuff behind the scenes such as the looming dread of university applications, but I'll just have to power through that one! I've literally just realised I haven't updated this blog since the end of June! Oh, what a terrible blogger I am. 

I'm going to go and try to cram maths now.

Laura.